Happy Sleepy Saturday! Or Sleep-In Saturday depending on your work schedule. I thought I had to work today, but I was able to weasel my way out of it. It will give me more time to work on my dissertation, and other projects I have going on. Yeah…sure. Most likely, I will soothe my abandonment wounds by watching the “Ghost Whisperer” marathon on the WE channel. I recently got into the show (now cancelled) because the concept of ghosts living around us and having unfinished business with the living intrigues me. I think that may be happening with my dad who has been gone for almost 10 years now. My dad is the biggest source of my abandonment issues, not because he wasn’t physically around, but when I was a kid, his emotional presence was a bit lacking in my life. I knew he loved me, but he had a bizarre way of showing it. Anyway, my Dad has been coming to me in my dreams lately. In these dreams, he seems so real. So I think maybe his spirit may be lingering for some reason. My mom, who thinks she is her own version of the ghost whisperer validates me when says she “sees him” ever so often around the house. She often laughingly tells me,
yeah your daddy is still lurking around, he better not be waiting for me, cuz I’m not ready to go yet!
But none of that is the purpose of my post. I want to use the weekends to give those of us on this abandonment exploration journey a “gentleness break” (I borrowed that term from some 12-step literature). On Sleepy/sleep-in Saturdays, I will post a quote surrounding the topic of abandonment and Sundays will be “Spiritual Awakening Sundays” where I will post a prayer or positive affirmation. Reflect on them as you choose. Here is the Sleepy Saturday Quote:
I had to get in touch with the source, I had to go back into my abandonment issues with my mother, I had to go into issues with my father I hadn’t even looked at before.
Tell me about it Kenny…